what anna wintour gets wrong
the all black battle cry and how to wear it without looking like a bore
The answer? Very little. (The woman is an icon).
At an old job, many years ago, I had to do a presentation for Anna. Her team booked us for an hour, though I was told by friends in the building that meant I should expect 22 minutes. The folklore is that she hates black, especially all black, which she finds utterly unimaginative, and so, despite my limited bank account and the fact that it was very possible Anna would barely glance at my outfit, I thought it made sense to buy a new one.
A friend who had been her assistant at one time told me that she loves Proenza, so I cashed in my Amex points (and yes, I’ve since learned this is not how you’re supposed to use Amex points) for a brand new plisse skirt with painterly splashes of blue and green from the brand’s boutique at Bergdorf Goodman. I wore it with an old ivory Celine top that I’d had forever, found via a secret sale at Kirna Zabete, and a classic Tom Ford pump I’d bought at the outlet mall near Storm King.
She did in fact give me a once over, and said she liked my skirt, a pleasantry perhaps, but one that I dined out on for weeks.
I had forgotten that story until a few weeks ago, when I did a mental inventory of recent outfits and realized I’ve submerged myself into a black hole. Anna would not approve.
But that’s where my birthday twin and I differ (We’re both Scorpios. Explains a lot, no?). Black can be boring, but it can also be revolutionary. It occupies a full spectrum of taste.
But the need for this kind of armor also suggests that there is a foil present: an inner fragility, a fight for autonomy. A battle cry to ourselves to not get too comfortable in oatmeal colored cashmere. Because we know we still need to navigate the world with a necessary distance, to be aware of our place in it.
When I think of the designers who, for me, have defined what an all black palette can mean, it occurs to me they are all dreaming up the same type of women. Phoebe Philo, Jil Sander, early Ann Demeulemeester, Lemaire, 90s Helmut, The Row.
I don’t think it’s a coincide that these designers are also the ones we describe as subversive. Unlike the minimalism of Calvin Klein, fraught with sexual innuendo, their clothes are meant to give us armor, to create a barrier between us and a harsh world. They put the choice of breaking the fourth wall in our hands.
Their clothes are often oversized or slouchy, with strong shoulders and menswear-inspired tailoring. In them, a subtle transfer of power ensues; the keeper of masculine energy becomes a question, not the assumed construct. When the fabrics are elegant, and the pieces functional and well-constructed, the emphasis is on the wearer, not on who she’s seeing.
I was having lunch with a stylist friend recently who dresses a number of well heeled women in the Bay Area. “I like women to look like women,” she said, of her opposition to buying Phoebe’s new line for her clients.
We all know how I feel about Phoebe. But we were both right, in our own ways. Geography plays a silent part here. Armor is odd when life feels soft. I can’t remember a character in a Nancy Meyers movie, awash in amber light, in tough-as-nails black (soft, flowy or nubby black doesn’t count)… except perhaps Agness Adler from It’s Complicated - the movie’s version of a villain - clad in a crop top in the opening scene. And though a crop top is not a voluminous padded leather jacket, they both project what we need them to project. In Meyers case, and for her audience, there’s no better visual mechanism to solidify a villain than to show a woman with rock hard abs hanging on Meryl Streep’s ex-husband.
In tougher emotional climates, where the weather is harsh and the power struggles are often, we have a need for Phoebe and her friends. These are clothes for a woman who aspires to project her own power. But the need for this kind of armor also suggests that there is a foil present: an inner fragility, a fight for autonomy. A battle cry to ourselves to not get too comfortable in oatmeal colored cashmere. Because we know we still need to navigate the world with a necessary distance, to be aware of our place in it.
In recent months, I’ve gravitated even more towards oversized clothing that I usually do. I went to try on a pant that I bought, in a haze, a few weeks ago and I realized I bought them two sizes too big. There is armor, and there is retreat; it’s a fine line.
And then you have the ones who forgo subtlety, whose statements are controversial and direct. Margiela and Rick Owens. Issey Miyake’s ethereal pleating technique, made fierce when combined with his structural pieces with exaggerated shoulders. Or Yohji Yamamoto, who once told The New York Times: “Black is modest and arrogant at the same time. Black is lazy and easy, but mysterious. But above all, black says this: I don’t bother you, don’t bother me.”
To wear all black well, it takes some guiding principles:
Texture Games
Opt for a mix of textures, balancing but not necessarily matching fabric weights. A heavy knit might be odd with something too delicate on the bottom, for example, but heavy all over is just, well, heavy.
Silk, wool and cashmere always work well together, both soft power fabrics that speak a similar language. A heavy selvedge denim is nice with a thin base sweater and blazer of robe jacket. The weight of the jacket balances out the jeans, while the thin knit keeps it from being overwhelming.
And I love a streamlined silhouette: a long black tunic dress that hangs straight with a tailored slack or satin pant. Add these earrings and a pointy flat or low heel (like these).
Metal Fixation
The easiest method is a belt, which breaks up all black nicely while preserving the monochrome of the look. A long necklace, sculptural earrings, a silver cuff pushed up over a silk shirt… Each of these choices communicates a certain attitude. A stack of diamond tennis bracelets? We know that girl.
A Hint of Contrast, not too much!
A silk scarf for a dainty touch, a grey t-shirt that peeks through between layers, a suede shirt, perfection over all black (or this is a good option too). It makes it visually interesting without competing.
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As someone who’s black vintage pony hair jacket arrived from eBay today, I approve this post 😄😉🖤
I love these tips. And the emeralds, of course ;)